Straight to DVD
by purpleicing
Summary: 'Bella's mind had flickered over every known reason to man for Jacob Black's sudden avoidance for the past two weeks—it ranged from family issues... to tactical espionage operations for the government.' Jacob/Bella


AN: A little one-shot that was actually supposed to be a drabble, but I fucked up. Ah, well. Next time. But this popped into my head- short and joky. Anyone reading this, feel free to send me any Jake/Bells prompts if ya want. Uhrrr, no beta. I just roll with it so sorry in advance for any mistakes. Sidenote: Inspired by imagining Jake dancing to the iconic song _My Dick_ by _Mickey Avalon_.

Anywho— **disclaimer—** just doing this for fun and making nothing off it blah-de-blah...

Bella's eyes ballooned to impossible measurements by the minute as the stage was graced by a familiar figure. A figure she'd known almost her whole life, a figure she'd melted into for hugs, one she leaned upon her time of need. And now this figure was front and centre on a spacious sleek stage in a shady club. It was dimly lit with a few set of LED lights surrounding the stage emitting up misty strobes of purple and aqua blues that succeeded in creating a sultry atmosphere. It was an unusual little thing found on the edge of town where Bella had to drive around a couple times to find.

She noted an impressive amount of female hands stretched out at the dancing figure rapidly clawing at his feet. Those claws were ready and eager to reach out and touch the object of their affections. Bella felt her own claws beginning to poke. That object affection or rather attention was her best friend... _and a little more_.

Bella's mind had flickered over every known reason to man for Jacob Black's sudden avoidance for the past two weeks—it ranged from family issues to pack duties to tactical espionage operations for the government.

The last time she even had a conversation with him was three days prior when she practically begged him to find some time in his busy schedule so they could hang out again. Bella missed him terribly and if it wasn't for his one promise from months back, her mind would venture into dangerous territories she'd work too hard to escape from to go back.

Jacob would laugh that too husky and low laugh that she swore vibrated her receiver and it warmed her chest and face. He'd reassure her that he had a lot of pack responsibilities and a few wolf disputes to tend to (a certain fiery she-wolf and an incorrigibly crude pack member came to mind) and by the end of the week, they'd be reunited.

He reminded her that being Second was not merely an Alpha's substitute during a rare but succinct absence, but involved a lot of physical and mental training, vigilance and strength. All of which needed to be at the point of unbreakable when he succeeded Sam and protecting his land and tribe hadn't just become responsibility but a heartfelt commitment. Bella's mouth would turn up a crooked angle, a cross between a proud smile and a pout as she'd playfully remind him that the pack weren't the only ones who relied upon his strength.

"My strength, huh?" he'd counter in low dusked tones that told her the conversation was heading into progressively comfortable territory since they'd both made their feelings clear, but decided that taking it slow was something they'd both benefit from based on her past. Eight months ago she'd be worried by his saucy suggestions but now it made her have to stifle girly giggles she hadn't emit since she was ten.

"Tell me more about this... _fascination_ of yours, Bells" he'd all but purr.

"Hmm, see now, I remember using the term _rely_ " she'd reply in a mockingly stern voice.

"Semantics" he chuckled at himself lightly and Bella didn't need soothsaying powers to know he was leaning into his counter with those deep midnight eyes almost boring through the receiver. She knew because she was doing it too, hoping maybe she could reach through the phone and drag him into her kitchen. Maybe then she'd finally be brave enough to ravish those petal soft lips the way she'd wanted for a while—shirtless or not. A sudden thought would occur to her then.

"Jake, are you naked?"

A short pause followed before those honeyed tones responded in a whisper that made butterflies the size of bats stir within her tummy "I like how you get straight down to business, honey"

She'd snicker despite herself, of course she'd give him more flirtatious ammunition but she didn't mind one bit "Jake—no, it's just that—uh—" her stammering and stumbling was immediately interrupted by a powerful rumble of laughter that made her heart flutter and she'd beg it to be still. His voice always sounded a little more sultry than he'd mean it to be whenever he was in a state of undress (previous close encounters in the forest after she'd witness him phase effortlessly in the flesh suggested so)

Bella just about managed to control her laboured breathing until they'd finally hung up reluctantly (more so on her part). But not before she'd make him promise to see her at least the coming weekend. There was a noticeable bounce in her step when she flitted around the kitchen, noticeable enough that Charlie's moustache twitched at the knowing smirk forming below it.

From her breathlessness at his relentless teasing and the stained scarlett blush that spread all the way down her laced chest—she was a hot mess and yet she cared as much as she did about her one of her father's games he'd religiously watch with Billy on weekends.

That Monday afternoon kept the light in her eyes for a good two days before she started getting paranoid again and she couldn't help it dammit, she knew something was up.

And whatever it was she wanted to help him in anyway that she could. With growing determination that's how she found herself driving down to La Push after barely escaping Mike Newton's persistent inquiry on how she was spending her weekend. Throughout the drive she'd feel a subtle sense of relief wash over her and soothe her concern. Bella would expect him to come running outside with that powerful, blinding grin and to be enveloped in those strong warm arms of his.

He never did.

She'd feel a strange flash of deja-vu as she sat in her truck, but then a tap on her truck window made her jump. Her brows would jump a little in mild surprise at her visitor before she'd grudgingly rolled down her windows—he was possibly the only person who could help her "You lost, Swan?" Paul Lahote smirked delightfully with mischief in his eye. Bella would brace herself for the next six minutes for his never-ending innuendos, penetrating to the bone snark and leering eyes all just to find that Jacob was not home and somewhere off the reservation.

And that somewhere was here. In a private club that catered apparently to young as seventeen and old as seventy—something she'd guess by obvious teenaged girls screeching wildly with all the excitement of a chimpanzee hopped up on coke...in Disneyland. And a silver haired pearl skinned woman who was reserved but her subtle smile showed how pleased she was with the show. Bella shrunk further back in her seat, she managed to bypass any restrictions the owner would've made for her sudden appearance just by dropping a mention of Paul's name—a favour she'd have to return when hell freezes over.

Bella found a secluded area west of the club at the very back with a glittery silver round table and a surprisingly plush jet black chair. She made herself as comfortable as she could get (in a place where sex, sweat and carpet cleaner where mingled together in a concentrated repugnant scent) ordering a bottled water from someone she hoped was a waiter and then just watched him. Her Jacob graced smoothly down the catwalk-esque stage with intentionally slow and sensual movements that made the women's squeals intensify to ear splitting levels.

When her water was set down politely in front of her, she smiled appreciatively and grabbed onto it like a lifeline and sipped slow and steady. It didn't do much to soothe her ire—were the squeals of anticipation and eyes glazed over with desire keeping him too preoccupied to have a friendship?

Bella didn't know whether to laugh, cry or throw something at his head and ruin his performance. In the space of two weeks, her best friend (and some) became Fork's own one-man Full Monty. She didn't miss the impressive amounts of cash stuffed down his cut-offs and splayed around his bare feet.

Fucking actual dancing wolves—was anything real anymore?

Bella's eyes roved over Jake's naked toned torso, the delectably smooth caramel skin that gleamed in those misty purple-blue lights didn't need any of the help. She found herself licking her lips and wondering what it'd be like to sweep her tongue along the line of his collarbone. If he actually did taste like caramel, she'd gladly have him on her pancakes every morning. Her eyes trailed down to where his cut-offs slung so very dangerously low on his hips as he rocked them into a grinding movement suggestively.

Bella swigged the bottle of water now vigorously as the squeals reached a new level of piercing screeches. She felt her face burning and her heart clearly sped up as result of working double time to help, it was distracting her from the verbal beat-down she was saving for him when his time with Fork's bachelorettes were up. Her eyes lingered far too long on those hips and were trailing a little further down that perfect V-shaped torso and she involuntarily gasped "Jake..."

Jacob's eyes snapped towards her in a heartbeat and it she found herself stuck on them, they were a shade darker and subtly widened in what she hoped was fear. It took him a few seconds to remember himself and to her surprise he cut his act short—disappointed moans and coaxing noises were made amongst the ladies, but that bright smile that rivalled the actual giant fiery ball in the sky's own left a wave of hushed sighs and hums of satisfaction. Bella almost wretched in disgust, but the thought of leaving without giving him a piece of her mind immediately quelled the abrupt nausea.

"Ladies, give it up for our special guest **Black Magic**!" she heard nasally female tones boom over her through black speakers. There was no amount of water left in her bottle to cover her loud snort, _Black Magic_? Bella irritably watched Jacob collect his cash before he'd leap off the stage with a fluid grace she'd never have and for some reason it pissed her off a little more. He'd jog towards her tactfully avoiding his adoring fans and a curvy brunette who seemed determined to make eye contact with him. He neared her table tentatively and gave her an adorable sheepish smile that almost softened her temper.

"Hey, Bells..." he trailed off at her glare that she was sure could melt a stick of butter. She responded in a cold, detached tone that made him flinch " Hey, **Black Magic**. Been a while." His shoulders slumped a little, but he kept a sober mask on while he pulled out a chair from a table to her right and dragged it back to her own. He sat opposite her, the round disco table a much needed obstacle between them. Bella was still thinking of ways to swing at him without breaking her hand.

Jacob cleared his throat a couple of times before speaking "I didn't want you finding out—" and that small unfinished admission was what did it. Bella shot up from her chair, planting both hands on the silver table and leaned over him with all the menace she could muster. Jacob's expression was a cross between frightened and...excited?

"Well I did, Jacob. You know, I thought you were so weighed down with responsibilities that I drove to your house today. And surprise, you weren't there—I had to ask Paul of all people" she heard him curse along with threats of murder under his breath.

"He told me I'd find you easy, I didn't know it'd be on stage in a sin shack with more girls than a Justin Timberlake concert. Am I that bad of a person to hang out with that you'd rather seek the company of hormonal teenagers?!"

"Bells, we **are** hormonal teenagers" he countered stifling a smirk she could've slapped off for him.

A familiar feeling of resignation chilled her to the bone as she straightened up to her height, it seemed she drove guys young and old away eventually. "I guess bore you that much" at this point it wasn't even a question, just echoes of past tortured reflections of abandonment and affliction.

His jaw clenched and his dark brows drew together, but she continued on, feeling dull pangs in her chest of a past pain haunt her "Listen, if you've changed your mind—" warm arms were around her in supernatural speed before she could even finish her offer of making this situation less painful for him. Bella was crushed against his bare chest and she found herself melting into it, he still had that circean pine scent that wrapped her in comfort.

They stood like that for a moment before Bella wriggled a little in his strong hold, but stilled at his powerful bass vibrating through her body "I did this for you, Bells". Now that really got her attention and she had to pull back with great effort to read his open midnight eyes—she was checking for dilated pupils because she'd be damned if he was doing drugs too.

Jacob smiled softly at her with understanding "I got this _temporary_ job through—believe it or not, Paul." Bella groaned into his neck, she believed every single word and not only because of Jake's incapability to lie to her but the memory of Paul's lecherous eyes raking over her as he tossed out the sin shack's address was burned into her brain.

"I needed some easy money and turns out Paul's been working here on and off for a year so I got him to pull some strings" he kept one arm wrapped around her waist and the other loosened to reach up to brush his thumb under her jaw gently, she closed her eyes at the contact and waited for him to continue.

"Honey, I know we said we'd take it slow and I'm so happy you want this— _us_ —eventually and you're taking a chance on what we got here. But, I want to do this right, you know..." Bella snapped her eyes open at that and watched as his own flickered to the floor briefly. Her ire totally forgotten, she wanted to tell him how it made her happy too, how much **he** makes her happy. Instead she gnawed at her lip to trap any words that threatened to involuntarily escape and listened.

"Our first date...I just want to treat you like you deserve, make sure I can give you whatever you want when the time comes. Which was actually going to be in a couple weeks...but, maybe after all this..." he gestured with a casual, but subtly awkward flick of his chin to the stage "You'd need more time". Jacob didn't anticipate Bella's quiet laugh that only increased as she leaned her head into his chest.

The emotions stirring within her chest were so overwhelming she could only express one at a time. Her laughter subsided at his confusion and he couldn't hide the hurt that flickered as quick as it disappeared "Jake, I'm sorry. I'm just laughing at myself, I drove all the way here thinking you were gonna..." she left the sentence hanging with a shake of her head "Well—you know—and after everything you said and done for me this past year... I should know better and it's not like I own you or anything and you don't owe me **anything**."

"You don't owe me an explanation, I shouldn't have left you alone like that. I'm sorry." he pulled her closer, self blame setting in and she quickly responded to refute it. Now she knew the truth there was no way she was letting him take a fall for being so naively sweet.

"You did it for our benefit. But, Jake, you know me—even better than myself sometimes— I don't need fancy dinners at lavish restaurants that serve champagne on tap or a midnight ride on a unicorn that craps gold." He snickered a little at that. "I'd be happy if it were just you and me watching cult classics and eating our weight in sweet and salted popcorn" she chuckled along with him.

"Bells, you're one of a kind and I love that about you. But I just didn't want you to think that I wasn't gonna make any effort or anything. I want it to be perfect with us"

"It's always perfect when I'm with you" she said the words without even thinking, but knew with her whole heart that they were true. Even all those months ago when she showed up at his garage frail, with dead eyes and a gaping hole in her chest—being his sunny, Jacob self, he made her smile, laugh and brought back the light in her eyes. He was patient and never pushed her, always letting her share when she was ready. It hardly seemed fair, he'd already given so much.

Her fingers lightly ghosted the crinkled, rough wads of cash stuffed around his waistband "You should keep this for yourself" she left no room for argument "And I hope you enjoyed yourself this last week..."

Jacob smirked a little at that "I was already planning on quitting today anyway" he laughed at her knitted brows and an eye roll that said ' _yeah-right_ '.

"And there just isn't enough Jacob Black to go around" he felt a small pressure that was Bella's fist colliding with his hip and he laughed even harder.

Bella grinned at the beautiful sound. "You are a pretty good dancer, Jake..."

"Aren't I?" he gave a mock sigh of self-appraisal that made her shake her head. A couple weeks later she'd share just how impressed she was.

"But, seriously? Black Magic?" she laughed freely at his crinkled nose and sheepish grin.

"Hey, it was either that or Bet on Black" she groaned even more at that and he shrugged "I know, I know" Bella knew he'd expect many jokes at his expense in the near future—which was good because she'd already reserved at least five.

"Anyway, I'm glad you're quitting. And I'm gonna help you find something much more synchronous with your _mad_ skills" she pulled away gently to lace her cool fingers with his warm ones "We're in this together, right?" she gazed directly into his soft, obsidian eyes, determined to show she meant it.

Jacob fully engulfed her hand in his own and squeezed it with silent affirmation, his eyes slithered lower end of her face and landed on her berry red lips with acute desire. Bella chewed them nervously as a response, if she just leaned in then the rest would be history and at last she'd have a taste of heaven that she longed for.

Those sensual rosewood lips of his were constantly calling her own, of course they'd be sweeter than any luxuriant forty dollar candy, softer than a rose and they never failed to make appearances at night in her dreams. But did she want her first kiss with Jake to be in a shady club?

In front of hormonal teenagers and a few women she was sure going through menopause? With the cool heavy bass of Mickey Avalon thumping out the speakers? Would it matter?

But as usual he'd read her like a freaking book and those tempting lips formed a gentle and warm smile that made her heart thump and she was sure he could hear it. Instead Jacob raised the hand he squeezed to his lips and placed a firm but promising kiss on her scarred wrist.

She was wrong, roses had nothing on those satin heavenly lips and she anticipated their date even more so. Bella smiled back at the recognition in his eyes "I'll bring The Room" she laughed at his agonized groan, knowing he probably wouldn't last ten minutes but his hilarious facial expressions would be worth it "And Fight Club" she added to appease him a little.

Jacob rolled his eyes with a grin before leading her slowly towards the exit, ignoring the questioning and prying eyes and whispered low enough for her to hear "Face it honey, after today, we'd probably end up making out through about ninety percent of those flicks".


End file.
